2.06.2013

Captivated Audience

Only in Israel does personal business become everyone's business. 
As I was walking passed a quiet street corner, I noticed a couple of policemen and civilians standing next to a police car, discussing a situation that had occurred between both parties.  What stood out to me, however, were the few passerby stopping no more than one foot from the parties mentioned.  These passerby were definitely not involved in what had happened, but were merely curious as to what was going on.  I was a bit surprised they weren't interrupting the conversation to give their opinion on what may have happened.  It's apparently their business too, after all.   

1.31.2013

Costume Change

Only in Israel are Purim costumes from both ends of the spectrum; ultra-revealing to, well, ultra-not.
Having received a costume catalog in the mail, I decided to glance through the pages. On one side of a page you could find costumes consisting of things like risque (to put it nicely) Spider-woman, fairy, and nurse. Flip the page and the costumes were of much more modest ideas such as a Chasidic Jew, Moses from the Torah, and Sabbath queen. Just as the politics and religious views of this country differ greatly among the population, so do choices of Purim costume. I think I'll go for something in between.



12.17.2011

The Urinal Land

Only in Israel is it acceptable for your child to urinate on any nick and cranny in this country.
It is not uncommon to pass a child urinating on a tree, bush, or corner of a building in Israel. Not only is it deemed acceptable, there is an unwritten rule: "Children are encouraged to urinate in public areas rather than seeking a proper toilet." Okay, only kidding. It does seem, though, that everyone accepts it as normal.

5.16.2011

Something Borrowed

Only in Israel does the woman behind the counter at the post office believe it to be normal to ask to borrow something that you are about to mail off.
It was time to return my rented cell phone and charger, but before I could do so, the post woman realized that the charger could very well be a perfect fit for her cell phone. Unfortunately, she had misplaced her own charger the night before and had not had the time to go and buy another before starting work. Fortunately for her, I came along. She asked to take a look at my rented charger, proceeded to take her cell phone out, and fit the charger into the cell phone. Looking at her strangely she asked, "Do you mind, I'll just charge my cell phone fore 10 minutes, and trust me, I will then place the charger in the package and mail it off." I replied with a hesitant, "sure, but I'll be seated until it's sent off."

1.26.2011

Patient's Love Records

After having been checked, probed, and proded by the 50-something Israeli male doctor, he came to the conclusion that I had a case of a "very bad cold". Well, of course, this surely means I am under severe pain and am, therefore, helpless in taking care of myself. So, the first question the doctor asks is, "Who's the lucky guy who get's to take care of you tonight?" Obviously thrown off by this innappropriate question, I responded with nothing but and uncomfortable smile and head bow. After such a cold response, the doctor at once realized his question was possibly a lawsuit waiting to happen.

12.19.2010

Two for the Price of One

Only in Israel is a movie theater exit simultaneously the entrance and exit to a nightclub.
The movie ended, and we headed toward the exit. The exit was a winding staircase that, instead of leading back into the lobby of the movie theater, led directly outside. As we arrived to the end of the staircase, we noticed a crowd of young, attractive Israelis waiting impatiently behind a barracade, harrasing the bouncer and selector in front of them. At once I realized we had not only exited a theater, but were also leaving the entrance and exit to a popular nightclub on Dizengoff. My question was whether or not these clubgoers were under the impression that we were leaving the club.

10.10.2010

Name Calling

Only in Israel are you sunbathing on the Mediterranean beach only to be startled by the voice of an anything-but-tactful lifeguard singling out the unruly beachgoers.
Being that the Tel Aviv beach is overflowing with people both on the sand and in the water, there must be a convenient manner for the lifeguards to grab the attention of the particular person they are trying to correct. This includes shouting over the megaphone statements such as, "You, the donkey in the black shorts..." or when speaking to a young boy regarding the trouble he is in for being unsafe in the water, "I just overheard what your father told you, and it sounds like you should really listen to him because if not, oyvavoylecha." People watching and lifeguard listening equals pure entertainment at the beach.